Wanna set up a Skype chat and rant?

A chat, that was just hilarious shenanigans at first, turned into a giant rant and made me feel better the other day.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

Ranting/venting is bueno

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i've ranted to, like, half a dozen people over the last few days. i think i'm good.

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Soulchild: u thnk evry thng stupid.
DaCrum: Warbear, why did you suddenly become pretty cool? Stop it.

Okie doke. The offer is always available, though.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

So now for the inciting advice, go punch the clown.

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

i punched a tree a little bit.

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Soulchild: u thnk evry thng stupid.
DaCrum: Warbear, why did you suddenly become pretty cool? Stop it.

No idea if you follow this comic, but your comment reminded me of it.
http://www.thezombiehunters.com/index.php?strip_id=473

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Stufflikehearts - He is a Sith Lord. I love Blood Lord :3
Jeffffey - Blood, you look at the information someone says, look over what really happened, and reply in a way that makes them realize what they were really thinking.
Mythrrinthael - Blood Lord, our local expert in interpretation of The Grim Tales from Down Below!
Fievel - Numerous campaigns and conquests, countless bodies decaying after the abandonment of victorious battlefields. Such is the life of Blood Lord.
Dusk_Imp - Blood Lord is like a celebrity here. Everything he does is pure awesome. ALL HAIL BLOOD LORD
Doctress Who - Why couldn't there be a Blood Lord in every forum? It would make life so much easier.
Snafu's Mercypostle.

I thought of Pam Poovey going "Who taught you how to punch? Your husband?"

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

I need to do something about my Father. I can't move out, yet, because I don't have the funds. But when I do move out, I'm terrified to leave my Mother. He has been an absolute nightmare lately. He was okay for a short period of time, but everything turned to shit, again, when my Dad had to stay at work. He called my Mom asking her to bring him a few sandwiches, and snacks. My Mom told him she would bring whatever she could scramble together, and he freaked out on her, and cursed her out just because she wouldn't give specifics. She didn't know what she was going to make, because she never got a chance to look at what to make. So she ended up not bringing him food, because he was being ignorant, and I do not blame her.

Then the next morning he started screaming at me for no reason, because I was standing in front of the dog treats, which I handed to him. Just because I handed them to him, and didn't move, he started acting like a lunatic.

Then comes today, he went out, was still being bitter over those two previous things. When he had no right to be mad, because he was being an asshole, came home after getting his oil changed. Me and my Mom just bought this nice glass vase, that had fake pears in it. We put it on the kitchen counter because it looked really cute there. We bought it at 5pm. He came home at 7, walked into the back door, saw the vase, picked it up, and slammed it down onto the counter. It ended up completely shattering the base of the vase, which ruined it. Which, turned into a huge fight which was me and my Mom VS him, obviously.

I need to call a doctor or something, to get him help. Because I cannot leave my Mother in this house with him, and because I know how she is, she will not leave him. Unfortunately, even if I try to talk her into it, it won't happen. She's one of those women, sadly.

How the fuck should I handle this? Because I can't take living like this, and as I said, I cannot leave my Mother alone.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

*afraid to leave my Mother alone. Not cannot, but then again this may be my subconscious talking with that "typo".

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

Unfortunately, you're going to have to do what's in your best interest and hope your mother makes the same choice. For her it's a case of leading a camel to water and it refusing to drink. The best option might be to 302 him, but now that you're in the burbs that might be harder to do than it is back in the city.

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

Stuff, your mother is grown woman, she'll see sense if she wants to. You should be more concerned for yourself at the moment since you, potentially, have an easier way out than she will.

I'm gonna take you guys up on this venting thing, but I don't really want to do it over Skype because I'm not really looking for an active conversation on this subject.

The fact that her and I are both too fucked up to be in a healthy and happy relationship sort of bothers me. I mean, we did the mature thing and talked and decided to hold off on romance until we're both sane, and that might be great because we'll have more time to be friends and to bond and blahdy blah, but I feel like it's going to be a bit hard for me. Being friends, that is. As it stands, I'm crazy about this girl, because we like the same shit and find the same stuff funny and I could just... see something in her eyes when we were together that makes this especially difficult. I know we did the right thing here and that everything's going to be fine eventually, but I can't help but regret it a bit. Which is inevitable, I suppose.

On the subject of why I'm fucked up, well... I don't particularly know how to go about fixing it. I have a difficult time trusting people IN GENERAL, because my ex... Ah shit, I'm sure a lot of you guys have heard the story before, but here goes.

I met her in the middle of summer, a little bit after school got out. First date, we went to the mall and just kinda putzed around (we were both 17 at the time, so there wasn't much that we could actually DO in town). Then we just kinda sat in the park and talked. For, like, a good three hours. It was great. The relationship lasted three months and it was awesome. I'm tellin' ya, there wasn't a single fight. Maybe some minor kerfuffles over dumb things, but that was the extent of it. Out of the blue (or what seemed to be out of the blue for me, i dunno how it went down from her perspective) she wanted a break. Which sucked. That had never happened to me until then, so I was kinda... Well, I was a bit pissed about it, and it showed. So, skipping all the messy details, we broke up.

A week later, she's dating a drug dealer (that did my ego some good, i'm tellin' ya).

So because of that, I have a hard time loving anyone and trusting people and just generally being a person in a relationship.

And I don't really know how I should go about fixing that.

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Soulchild: u thnk evry thng stupid.
DaCrum: Warbear, why did you suddenly become pretty cool? Stop it.

The only way to fix it, in my mind, is to give people another chance. I know it can be hard, I went through a break up that was almsot the exact same scenario. I liked this girl a lot, and I thought every thing was fine, and then bam. It destroyed me. Not to be melodramatic, but it changed my outlook on love and relationships in some important ways. It took me like 2 years to get over her, and another several months after that before I wanted to be in a relationship again. Eventually, as hard as it can be, you just have to give people another shot. You have to take that risk, when you feel ready.

I re wrote this like 3 or 4 times trying to get it right. Hopefully something came across that helps.

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Tuor stole my spotlight and made it even shorter. But I agree with him as well, but if what I wrote might help, go for it.

I think I can relate to some degree. My ex and I had the whole thing going on like you did. I was what, 17 and she was 15, almost 16. We had a great run, almost a year. She wanted a break and just like you, I was kind of confused and pissed and it showed. Eventually we both came to the agreement (more like she came to it, I had to just sit there and let it happen), and we pretty much broke up. She was and is very Christian and lives by it to the day. I personally, am not a very religious person and that's another story in itself. A week after we broke up, she found herself a nice Christian guy (go figure). Something about this just pissed me the hell off, something just stirred in me that I had never felt. I was hurt, broken, angry, the whole nine yards (I imagine you can relate?)

So some time later I still found myself in this same mind set. It literally took me about 5-6 months just to trust anyone, or let anyone near me. I had broken a few hearts on the way, sadly, as I've always tried to be a guy to make everyone smile. It took me another 2 months to even try and have another relationship. The fact of the matter is things happen, and as much as it hurts it can't be helped. Even if you know this yourself, it's a tough and painful experience. However, the best thing I figure is just to do the things you enjoy. Things like that are no quick fix, and the more you dwell on it, the longer it hurts.

I finally asked out another girl, and it's been great and I hope it stays that way. But the first thing you need to do is let go and enjoy some fun. Friends, midnight adventures through the town getting Taco Bell and playing video games, something you use to get away from stress. For me, aromatherapy, drawing, video games and especially skateboarding were my ways of doing this. It got my mind out off of her (everything else)

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I GOT 'DEM HUMPS.
Doctress Who:You can be my Brony bitch ;D
Droctress Who:Jas, would you like me to make you a sandwich?
JesusChrist: Well if you insist Jasthn I'll use it with you. Spread them cheeks
Tragedy_and_Comedy: Jas is about as dangerous as a kitten.
Blood Lord:I hit your dog with mah truck. :3
Lenore Celestalis:*jumps on your back* weee~
Come check out my story in the Literature Thread. Update? It is true!
I also doodle quite a lot. Check out my art thread here!

@Tuor: That's fairly hard for me, to be honest. I mean, there's maybe only one person (one of my roommates) that I actually open up and talk to and consider my best friend and that alone helps a bit, but that's not really...the point, I guess.

I have no trouble with making friends, given time, but I guess I don't really hang out with people much. I hang out in my room a lot and the 'risks' I take are fairly minimal. I feel like I should maybe get out there and start doing things with people?

@Jasthn: I feel like the situation is slightly different (with the Christian guy). The idea that a drug dealer is more appealing than I am just stung A LOT because I was a stand-up guy with an awesome job at the time.

I did go through a phase, however, where I would have week-long relationships that I just ended for little to no reason. I broke some hearts and once I realised what I was doing, I never really tried to have a relationship until I got together with this girl.

I had been making an effort to go out and hang out with friends and see movies (mostly by myself, because it helps me get away from stress and I seriously hate seeing movies with people) to try to make myself feel better, and it was actually starting to help, but then this break-up happened and all I feel like doing is moping, which is a normal reaction, I s'pose, and is completely warranted, and I'm going to try not to let it be like this for very long. Maybe play some games with friends and go do dumb things. I dunno. Going for walks and listening to tunes tends to help. *shrug*

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Soulchild: u thnk evry thng stupid.
DaCrum: Warbear, why did you suddenly become pretty cool? Stop it.

The risk I was more talking about was in terms of getting into a relationship again. It's good that you make friends easily, I didn't have that advantage. Getting out more might help you. I mean, a moping period is definitely warranted, as you said. That's fine. Have a few days or a week, and start doing things that you enjoy again and get back out there. I really have no other advice than that. Learning to trust people again is tough and it's a slow process.

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This honestly was my attempt at getting back into relationships. This was my risk and it didn't turn out particularly well. Though maybe I was just kind of hoping too big too soon. I should just look for something small and simple for now, I think.

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Soulchild: u thnk evry thng stupid.
DaCrum: Warbear, why did you suddenly become pretty cool? Stop it.

They may be different, but I suppose the whole other story I mentioned before is what makes them seem similar to me. In the sense that you had something good going for you is the best part, but to have her suddenly spending her time with a drug dealer is really no nice discovery yes. In my case, when I told my very christian parents I had no interest in going to church, participating in this religious practice, they nearly fell off their rockers. I was "grounded" but more kind of viewed upon as a kid who failed their parents and performed some sort of immoral act. Soon after, my parents talked to my grandparents and what they should do (my entire family is very close to their religion) and put me in a ton of summer bible schools, Christian programs and the likes to get me back into Christianity. This worked to no avail which not only irritated my parents, but my grandparents and so on.

So in the end, my parents were somewhat embarrassed. During the vacation bible schools though I had been bullied and harassed (Keep in mind this was when I was 12-13) and at one point the teacher and some sort of episode where she had called me out on being ignorant and lazy (I had to keep asking people for pages in the bible and so on, and I guess she found this annoying) so in the end, I was fed up with it all after all these small things built up. When I first started talking to my ex before we went out, I was a bit... hesitant on whether it would be a good idea. I decided I'd try it out though and it was good for the time being. But her reasons for leaving me in the end were because: "I feel like God is telling me to do this" and "If a man and a woman aren't both Christian blah blah blah", so it made me feel cheated and betrayed and pissed off. So when she went out with the christian boy I felt like I had only been pushed aside because of religion. In my eyes for you, I'm wondering if it was the same in the way that she was maybe more interesting in the drugs, or curious at the very least?

At the very least, just let this whole thing works its way out of your system, it's not something you want to rush or try to get done as fast as you can. You'll know when you're ready to try and look for someone else and you'll have time between now and then to make friends and have fun. It's just something that has to work its way out.

_________________
I GOT 'DEM HUMPS.
Doctress Who:You can be my Brony bitch ;D
Droctress Who:Jas, would you like me to make you a sandwich?
JesusChrist: Well if you insist Jasthn I'll use it with you. Spread them cheeks
Tragedy_and_Comedy: Jas is about as dangerous as a kitten.
Blood Lord:I hit your dog with mah truck. :3
Lenore Celestalis:*jumps on your back* weee~
Come check out my story in the Literature Thread. Update? It is true!
I also doodle quite a lot. Check out my art thread here!

i typically avoid this thread because it's depressing, but i checked it today.

stuff: you're a vibrant and brilliant young woman who is being crippled by your devotion to your mother. i know that's hard to take, but as much help as your mother needs you, you need to focus a significant majority of your attention on fixing your life. you need to get away and sort yourself and your goals out. find something to work towards and put all your attention in to that. i know that's much easier to say than to do, but it's the only way forward. you can't fix your family, you can only change your own outcome. my family's quite the same with the awfully ignorant and angry father paired with the forgiving, patient, doormat mother (although my father doesn't seem to be as prone to bursts of anger as yours, he has long continuous bursts of bitter and snide behaviour). focus on yourself rather than the horrible people and the poor people that chose to spend their lives with them.

warbear: bitches are bitches. there are chicks who have fucked with my perception of women and relationships in the way they've behaved and one of the hardest things to do is to learn that not all women are like that. it takes a long time and a lot of focus on what you need to do, but it soon becomes clear that not every woman is a heart-breaking whore. there aren't many people that i feel i can speak openly and honestly to, and i'm sure you feel the same. it's sometimes difficult to differentiate between women who are honestly being intimately friendly and those who are flirting and sometimes the girls doing it find it hard to tell which one they're currently subscribing to. just let things happen. let pieces fall into place and don't worry about jumping into any relationship at all. if it's gonna happen it will regardless of your intentions.

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I'm NORML and I VOTE
Soul Silver Friend Code: 0260-2900-0828

Truer words have never been spoken.

_________________
Stufflikehearts - He is a Sith Lord. I love Blood Lord :3
Jeffffey - Blood, you look at the information someone says, look over what really happened, and reply in a way that makes them realize what they were really thinking.
Mythrrinthael - Blood Lord, our local expert in interpretation of The Grim Tales from Down Below!
Fievel - Numerous campaigns and conquests, countless bodies decaying after the abandonment of victorious battlefields. Such is the life of Blood Lord.
Dusk_Imp - Blood Lord is like a celebrity here. Everything he does is pure awesome. ALL HAIL BLOOD LORD
Doctress Who - Why couldn't there be a Blood Lord in every forum? It would make life so much easier.
Snafu's Mercypostle.

Anhedonia is boring.

By definition, yes.

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bleh.

I'm taking my Mom away on a cruise in August, so I'm gonna try to talk to her without my Dad there as a distraction. I'm definitely planning on moving out, but I want to see if she can do something with herself.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

Mmm.. If i asked my mother if she was going to be okay, she'd of course would say she'd be fine (even if it was a lie). And if your mother is "one of those women", wouldn't talking to her be... Pointless? I mean, i'm not sure what she could do, on her own, that would give you peace of mind. What possibilities are you thinking of?

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She doesn't really talk to me here, unless she's not around my Dad. When he's nowhere to be seen, she'll talk to me about everything. I'm hoping once I get her onto the cruise, and away for a week, we can actually talk about shit since we'll be alone and not have to worry about him walking through the door. I know she's pissed about everything going on, but she seems too scared to talk about anything due to him having a schedule that could have him walking into the door at any moment.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.