@True: lol then what the fuck are you torturing yourself for if you're gonna go "pshaw she's not that hot". lol you.

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except we didn't say "fake your whole life"

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I'm still the Queen of Dicks

we said fake being confident, which is not harmful in the slightest.

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I'm still the Queen of Dicks

If you're that uncomfortable you should just stop trying to date until you figure out what you want to do.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

People often tell me that once you ask a girl out once, asking any girl out becomes SO much easier.

I'd like to get past that first speed bump.



@Stuff: What do you mean by: "what I want to do?"

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"Hmm, the more you look into it the more flaws you see, just as it is with everything."

So why are you not going for it then?

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One thing though, it's not cool to say "i'd like to ask that girl out cuz she seems easier than the others", which is basically what you said before. You're thinking "once i say something to her, i'll be able to say things to all the others", which sounds like you don't really want to tag along with her for love, but as some sort of training method, so are you sure you know what you want to do? What if she said yes, would you let her go after a while because you want your bar to be higher?

Maybe you do know what you want to do, but the way you speak doesn't really say so for me, do you really like that girl? If so then just do it, but do it out of love, not out of wanting to feel better about yourself dude.

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What are your true feelings, and what is your comfort limit on what you can do? So I can give you better advice on what to do with women, as best I can from my pov.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

@Mir@k:
Love is a double edged, diamond tipped sword that I dare not go near, not again, not willingly.


Ok then, so yeah the whole thing does sound rather shallow and pointless, so that thing with that particular girl in Bio is generally nixed. Unless condition somehow proves otherwise.


@Stuff:
Wait a tick I need to think about that.

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"Hmm, the more you look into it the more flaws you see, just as it is with everything."

Take your time. :)

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

Also, don't feel forced about it. If you want to talk about it, feel free. Or if you do, but don't want a bunch of people to see, there's pms. If not, tis all good.

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Tuor: Stuff is our resident, hot mess, alcoholic.
Senel: Stuff is the patron saint of getting shitfaced. You replaced your organs with an engine that runs solely on alcohol.
RIP Lucky. I love you so much.

These are all educated guesses based on self-interviewing and my 1.75 perspectives of myself.

My feelings appear to be purely depression on the surface, but underneath is a torrent of many emotions. Desperation, loneliness, betrayal (trust issues), repressed passion that I have been recently attempting to turn into "art" of some kind (such a slow process) and let's see.... what else.... well I certainly feel tortured and crave a simple solution to end the pain, I seem to have a slight hatred towards the norm, it's concept and it's physical representatives. And I'm not sure....


As for what I'm comfortable doing.... I am also not sure. I know I can easily talk with any random individual who engages me in pleasant or intelligent conversation, be it boy, girl, young or old. I'm considerably ok with hugging though I internally scream still when I feel it's more for mocking or messing with me as opposed to a legit hug. I'm not sure where to go from here...

Memories surface
Wounds that never recovered.
Ignorance is bliss

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"Hmm, the more you look into it the more flaws you see, just as it is with everything."

Last Tuesday I saw a psychiatrist for the first time of my own volition. Told her how I felt, how I felt empty inside and that I didn't really experience any emotion at all, and that I had no sex drive. But since I told her that I was calm and rational in pretty much any situation, that I don't recall a single instance of being angry, she said she didn't believe I had depression and that I was pretty much the perfect human being and that she wished all her other patients were like me (I'm guessing she deals with a lot of bipolar people). But I suppose she doesn't feel there can be an other extreme to that scale, where instead of being too emotional, a person can be too robotic.

I know it sounds boastful, but she did say all that, and I was surprised a bit that she actually said something like that and that she didn't believe there was anything wrong with me as far as she could see (I guess zero sex drive and saying you don't feel much of anything isn't a concern).

But with her opinion formed, she seemed rather confused as to why I was even there. She probably felt she was missing something, since she probably recognized that if she really thought this kid was so well-off mentally, he'd have no reason for being here, so she wrote a prescription anyways. We'll see if it works.

Doesn't sound like a very capable psych to me.

I guess that's what you get with a psychiatrist, opposed to a therapist or psychologist.

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What exactly is the difference?

Psychiatrists are medical doctors, they have meds and tend to use them. Psychologists are social scientists and tend to think of sessions for their own theories.

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

Oh, Whatis.

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What?

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

You were disparaging both psychiatrists and psychologists?

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It's what I do and I'm not lying.

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?

I was just making sure, haha

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I remember my first and only Psychiatrist. He was an alright fellow. Not sure about his prescriptions though. Ended up having 5-6 different pills I took a day. Don't really know if they made me better or not.

Funny thing though is I stopped taking all of them in less than a year after some stern learnens from my dad. The best doctor I ever had.

Also, backing up a few pages, I actually did what Stuff suggested for True, asking a girl to just hang out. But I'm worried if it's still considered a date since it's just the two of us doing things you would on a date. Is it a good or bad idea to bring up the question if it is? I do want to date this girl, but it's been a while since I've actually dated, so it might just be my nerves making me worry over nothing.

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"Cogito, ergo vos es eggo." A.K.A. "I think, therefore you are a waffle."

That's why I dislike psychiatrists. Just pills.

So you want it to be a date?

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That was a bad doc, normally you shouldn't prescribe pills on the first session. Also, never that many pills, the way those fuckers can interact is really dangerous.

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CAUTION: Would anyone tell me if I was getting stupider?