I hold no grudge against anybody, mentioned or otherwise.
Somewhat inspired by Maru's raps. But I can't rap for squat.
So instead here are a series of couplets:
Poem of a Noob
By: True Order
Based on a True Story
I'm here, everybody, back from the dead.
Recovered since the time I was so hated in that thread.
You all remember that time? We all make mistakes.
But you guys were so harsh I thought my spirit would break.
I understand now that it was all necessary.
However, at the time, I felt quite the contrary.
My first post in spam and Warbear called me a queer.
Afterwards Math asked "How the hell'd you get here?"
So I told him the short version
of my little excursion,
But couldn't help but feel I was receiving aversion.
I ignored that feeling and continued to post.
With Roseluck in my sig and my avatar, a ghost.
It wasn't that bad, I was a typical noob.
But then you all raped me hard and didn't even use lube!!
I came under fire from every direction.
Being made fun of for my poor word selection.
Even in the Pony thread
you were making me dread.
Everywhere the Vets were looking down from respected positions.
All the while I grew tired of their constant inflictions.
So I did what I did, I spammed in the spam forum
completely unaware that I was breaking decorum.
As if every other poster wasn't already vexed
what really was my downfall was THE WALL OF TEXT.
They all screamed "TL:DR!!"
I got told off by BR
I tried to dig my way out, but I was making it WORSE!
I had dug my own grave and even rented a hearse!
After seeing all this loathing I began to plead:
"I'm sorry for the WALL it was a simple misread!"
"Please tell me how, if there's way, can I improve?"
They said to me: "Ya just gotta go with the groove."
I didn't understand, there was no "groove" that I could see.
Luckily I got help from the poster PBT.
He said "You'll have to persist and you'll have to endure,
but you should lurk for a few months, just to be sure.."
For some odd reason I didn't like the plan...
maybe because of its drastic time span.
Not wanting to do that I sought to fix my rep.
Only to ruin it with another misstep.
I had no choice, there was no question.
I had to proceed with Twilight's suggestion.
So I lurked in the spam forum for many many days.
It took me so long to understand their ways.
I saw many noobs appear and make the same mistake as I.
I realized, to the vets, I was the bad guy.
I saw this trend repeated for what seemed a dozen times.
A noob would appear, screw up, and be punished for their "crimes."
Some noobs held on, for better or for worse.
All having to deal with that stubborn beginner's curse.
I lurked for two whole months and what I learned was quite clear.
The trick to it all was to be sincere.
Be true to yourself but chill out a bit.
It's OK to dick around but know when to quit.
While you CAN say whatever, please understand.
Think before you post or your hide will be tanned.
The Spam Forum may be renowned as a very crude dwelling.
But it can truthfully be very nice, provided you mind your spelling.
Thank you for reading. Feel free to give feedback or comment.
Please do not interpret this as hostile or negative because that was certainly not my intent.
A wise Poet wrote:I kind of hate writing, because Plato once said
"You're the only interpreter of the thoughts in your head."
In other words: You don't have to worry about someone misinterpreting your thoughts, but you have to worry about that for your writing.
Thank you for your time.
Edit - Changed a few parts for accuracy's sake. Spelling fix