Elemental Warriors - Chapter 2 has been updated

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Elemental Warriors - Chapter 2 has been updated

Postby UberCaligo » Wed Apr 12, 2006 2:46 pm

Hiya people! I'm pretty new here, and sadly, I can't draw too well. But I do love to write! And this is a re-make of my horrid, first story. So far, I have just recently completed Chapter 1. Oh, and the title is NOT a ripoff of Yu-Gi-Oh GX's Elemental Heroes. I came up with this title long before Yu-Gi-Oh GX even came out. Anyways, I'll be posting up Chapter 2 later and edit that same message with the updates of it.

Oh yes, another note. Don't hold back in giving me critique, as long as it doesn't totally destroy my self-esteem. Thanks! ^_^


Chapter 1



Ages past, a prophecy was told. The world was to be destroyed when a time of great calm came to be. A monster would arise from the depths of the earth and reach a temple far into the desert. There, it would unleash its full might and destroy the earth in one blow. But, prophecy also told legend of five warriors that would also arise and destroy the monster, giving way to peace once more. The legend was carved into stone, so that if the monster did arise one day, they would know not to lose hope, for they would look upon the stone and remember the five heroes that would save them all…This is their tale.
Interrupting a calm day, two men were tearing through the village chasing after a boy about 13. “Get back here you punk!” the men were screaming as they toppled carts of fruits and vegetables as well as tradable goods. The boy, known as Caligo, had stolen a full box of goods from their cart which included trinkets, food, water, and supplies for travelers. He was about 5“2, with white hair that draped over his face, deep red eyes, a no-sleeves shirt that went down to just above his waist, he wore a red belt that wasn’t really there for anything except for decoration, his pants were bluish and went down to his ankles. “Hey! You jerks weren’t even taking us seriously, so I thought we might as well just take what we needed!” He was definitely winning this chase as well, the two men were big, but it slowed them down when they had to push something over to keep going whereas Caligo could just jump over it or slide under. After about half an hour into the chase, the men stopped, cursed to themselves and gave up. Caligo smirked and jumped onto a roof of one of the houses, looking over the contents of the box.
Just as he opened it, though, a girl about the same age as Caligo smacked him across the back of his head with a staff. She had on a white dress with blue sleeves, and a red robe over her. Her hair was golden and just past her shoulders with green eyes. She was about 5”0 as well. She held a long silver staff with a slightly curved tip. A golden lantern decorated beautifully with purple ribbons and blue crystal on the bottom dangling ribbon. Inside of it was an odd glowing light.
Caligo dropped the box, grabbing the back of his head and turning around, “Florina! Why’d you hit me! Jeez, that hurt you know!!!!” The girl, apparently named Florina, stood upright, crossing her arms with her staff tucked in her arms, “Because you stole that! We aren’t here to steal things, we’re here to find out information about those disappearances and where the heck Taken is!” Caligo got up and brushed the dust off his pants, “Hey, they wouldn’t stop bothering us, and it’s their fault they left their cart unattended after they went after us because someone pulled me away!”
Florina hit him again just as he finished, “I pulled you away because you were about to kill them! I saw you pulling your sword out you maniac! Ugh, never mind. Come on, we have to keep moving. You know we can’t stay in one place for awhile.” Caligo got up and nodded, “Yah, yah, I know.” He brushed the dust off his pants and began walking along the roof to the other end. “Which towns are we headed to next anyway? And where the heck is Taken, he’s the one who’s supposed to be telling us this stuff.” Florina sighed and sat down against one of the chimneys, “Jeez Caligo, your one heck of a boyfriend. You can’t even do stuff on your own!” Caligo blushed, practically falling over the side of the roof, “Florina, we are not…err…friends…in…that way! So stop saying it!” Florina frowned in a puppy-dog eyes kind of way, “So, you don’t love me?”
He blushed even more now, he rubbed his face and didn’t answer her, “Come on Florina, let’s just go find Taken, this conversation is getting weird.” He jumped off of the roof and landed on the ground below perfectly fine and looked up, holding his arms out, “Jump, Florina!” She walked over to the ledge, her arms holding her dress down, “Caligo! I’m not gonna jump!!! I’m in a DRESS!” Caligo blinked and kept his arms out, “So what? It’s not like I haven’t flipped your dresses up thousands of times before.” Florina glared down at Caligo, but blushed as well. She backed up from the front of the roof and picked up one of the rocks holding the roof down and chucked it at Caligo, nailing him in the head, “Grr, take that!” Florina threw down a few more rocks and hit him a few more times before actually coming down the right way.
Caligo rubbed his sore head while following Florina out of the village, “So, where is Taken? Did you find out anything about him?” Florina sighed and held her finger up to her chin for a couple of minutes, “Uh…Oh yah! Someone said something about a tall, blonde haired man coming through the village and handing out some ice thingies. That definitely sounds like Taken! Villagers said he was heading in this direction, something about looking for a lake.” Caligo smiled, “Heh, I’ve known him for awhile, that’s definitely him.” He took a deep breath, and let it out in a sigh, “I can taste the water in the air, it’s this way.”
Florina smiled and hugged Caligo, “Oh! You are useful sometimes!” Caligo glared at her, “What do you mean SOMETIMES!?” Florina smiled and stuck her tongue out, “Oh nothing.” He grumbled something under his breath and started to walk forward again. Florina followed being him, she was staring at him a bit, her head titled slightly. “What are you staring at?” He eventually blurted out. “I’ve known you for so long, Caligo, but I still don’t get how you can do stuff like that.” Caligo stopped and turned around, “What do you mean, ‘stuff like that’?” Florina poked him on the head, staring at him some more. “You know, stuff! Like…uh, how you set stuff on fire! Yah! And…like…how you smell and hear stuff so much better than other people! And the claws! And your fangs! If you only had wings, you’d be like a demon!” Caligo looked at his claws and blinked a bit, he didn’t put much thought into that stuff. “Hmm, I dunno. Maybe I am part demon or something.”
Caligo sighed, “Do you think the temple would still take me in? Even if I was…you know, a demon.” Florina hugged him, “Of course they would. I’m sure they’d make an exception for you. You’ve protected the temple on hundreds of occasions.” Caligo breathed another deeper sigh. He looked at his claws again and lowered his arms, leaning into Florina’s embrace. “There, all better!” She let go, smiling happily.
The moment didn’t last very long, there were bandits crawling around the entire outskirts of the village, and they were ready to attack. “Crap…” Caligo backed up and pulled Florina behind him. He drew his katana and screamed out to them, “I know you’re there, you bastards! So come out and fight me!!” After a second of silence, bandits were jumping down from trees, coming out from behind rocks, and walking towards them. Knives dyed crimson with blood were clenched in most of their hands.
Florina held her staff up in a defensive position, remaining behind Caligo. She gulped and meekly blurted something out, “C-Caligo? Do you think we’re gonna make it?” Caligo held his sword up, grinning, “Of course.” One of the bandits, coming up from the rear of the crowd, yelled out to Caligo, a long broadsword slung over his shoulder. “You, boy! You have the courage to challenge us!?” They seemed just a gang of bandits out for some money and maybe a slave to sell, but they had a bigger picture in mind.
The one that had spoken before decided to again, “I’ll be generous today. How about you hand over all your possessions, the girl hiding behind you and we’ll be on our way.” Caligo growled at him, “Fuck off!” The man smirked, dropping the broadsword off of his shoulders and into the ground, “Very well, we can do this the hard way. Boys, let’s go!” With those words, the bandits charged forward, a bloodcurdling scream echoing throughout the once peaceful clearing.
The battle was difficult for Caligo. The bandits weren’t too hard to cut down, but protecting Florina at the same time was difficult. It didn’t help too much that they were going almost directly for her. “Gah, damnit.” The bandits weren’t simple novices, most of them were skilled enough to get close to Caligo or even slit his clothes. Finally, Caligo stumbled back, there was a knife in his arm and was drawing an immense amount of blood. “Florina. I dunno how much longer I can make it against these guys. When I tell you to, run back to the village. Don’t stop, find transportation and get back to the temple.” Florina batted off some of the bandits with her staff, “Caligo, don’t say that!” She didn’t hold out very long, she was too distracted with Caligo and was shoved back, the staff ripped out of her hands.
Caligo caught her, but wasn’t standing very well. The bandits had totally surrounded them and several of them stabbed knives into his back. Two of which were nearly puncturing his lungs. Florina helped hold him up, but she couldn’t do much since the bandits were moving in to strike for the last time, but they stopped. The one with the broadsword stepped through them. He smirked down at Caligo and Florina who was holding him in a kneeling position. “Boy. What was the name she called you? Caligo?” He growled up at him, hating the fact that he knew his name. “Ah, Caligo it is then. I shall make you a deal. Those knives in your back and arm are going to kill you soon. You can’t fight with them. One is paralyzing you. If you hand the girl over to me now, I think I’ll let you live.”
He sat for a split second, standing up and spitting onto the bandit’s face. “You sick, delirious fool!’ The bandit shoved Caligo back. He pulled the broadsword from his shoulder again and drove it straight through Caligo’s chest. Florina gasped and stated to go to him, but was held back, gagged, and tied up by some of the other men around them. The bandit wiped the spit off of his face, and spat onto Caligo’s motionless body. Florina was dragged away, screaming and crying for both herself and Caligo.

Added after 1 minutes:

Uhm, Chapter 2 will be up soon. And sorry about the pictureless characters. I hae pics, but I am still unsure of their artsists, so I'll put them up once I find the artist.
Last edited by UberCaligo on Sat Apr 15, 2006 5:56 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Postby Darkness_calls » Wed Apr 12, 2006 6:18 pm

The story is good.

But one thing, you should use the "ENTER" button much more. Lines and everything, just so It will be easier to read. That of course could only be my oppinion.
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Re: Elemental Warriors - New Beginnings - Chapter 1

Postby UberCaligo » Wed Apr 12, 2006 7:17 pm

I do have spaces and stuff in the original on my computer, but the whole thing was too big to have the spaces.
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Postby Darkness_calls » Wed Apr 12, 2006 7:22 pm

Yes that probably is right ...
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Re: Elemental Warriors - New Beginnings - Chapter 1

Postby UberCaligo » Thu Apr 13, 2006 5:14 am

Chapter 2




A few hours after the event had occurred, Caligo began to stir. He awoke, rising up. He looked around and saw the knives that were stuck in his back. They were in a forest, near a lake. He could hear the water. Taken, a rather tall man, sat a few feet away from Caligo, jabbing at a campfire. He was about 5”7, short blond hair, a white shirt, and his usual white cloak was over Caligo. “Hey, you feeling alright?” Caligo rubbed his head and ran his hands over where his wounds were. He could feel the thick bandages over them. “Yah, I think I’m alright…Florina! Take, did you see Florina being taken by those bastards?” Taken sighed, “I’m sorry, Caligo. I saw her…I saw everything. But I couldn’t stop it. I’m sorry.”
Caligo laid back down, “It’s ok Taken…Do you have any idea where they took her?”

Taken shook his head, prodding at the fire a few more times before dropping the stick. “No. The bandits had me as well, you see, and abandoned me there after they took Florina. After that I brought you here and bandaged those wounds. I know this may be hard for you, but…just try not to think too much about it right now…You need rest, Caligo.” He growled, screaming at Taken, “How can you expect me to just lay here and sleep when those sick freaks could be doing anything they want to Florina!!” He slammed his fist into the ground, fire shooting up around them. Grabbing the staff laying next to him, Taken stood up and pointed the crystal tip at the fires. Ice came up and doused the fires. He walked over to Caligo and stepped on his forehead, pushing him into the ground. “I said get some rest. Getting pissed off and marching around with severe wounds isn’t going to help.”

Not trying to fight back against him, Caligo just laid there, soon falling asleep. Taken moved his foot, and Caligo’s tilted slightly to the side. Taken stabbed the staff into the ground and rested against a tree. He formed a small ball of water in his hand and put the campfire out. An hour or two later, Taken fell asleep too.

Miles away, the bandits were just stopping. They had been traveling for a few hours on horseback. One of them jumped off, throwing Florina onto the ground. She struggled against the ropes that still bound her. “Damnit, do we really need to deal with her? Why don’t we just kill her now? What would it matter, boss?” Another one of them jumped off, apparently the leader and the one who had stabbed Caligo. “It matters because if we don’t have her alive, that guy will kill us all. Do you remember what he did to the others? He obliterated them when they wouldn’t listen to me and tried to attack him.” The bandit near Florina grumbled, picking her up by the rope. “I’ll bring her inside. Did that guy ever say when he’s coming back, boss?” The leader shook his head, “Nope. Hey boys, bring the horses into the back!” The other bandits nodded. A little less than half of them jumping off. The other group of them started riding the horses into the stable of which their leader was addressing.

The leader, walked up to an enormous palace. The walls were a good twenty feet up. The gate stood towered up. It was nearly fifteen feet across and twenty-five feet high. He pulled a small device out of his pocket. Holding it in the air as he walked towards the gate. He stopped in front of the gate, pulling a trigger on the device and set off a large explosion in the air. Minutes later, the gates began to open and the bandits continued inside.

Toward the north, the young feudal lord walked back and forth in his private chamber, “Gah, I hate being a feudal lord. It’s such a pain in the ass. I have to deal with every problem that the villages come up with. Droughts, food shortages, crimes. I hate it! I wonder what they’re doing right now. The only friends I have outside of this stupid palace…” He sat down in a large throne. Resting his head in his hands. “Guys….why did you have to leave me here!?! Ooh, I have an idea. He walked over to a large wardrobe and pulled out a long, pure white cloak. He pulled it over his golden hair. He stood about 5”7. He was dressed in slightly indigo colored clothes. There were golden designs on them with a few different clan crests. His name was Lance. “Alright, now let’s see. Where’s that hidden escape tunnel?” He kneeled down, running his hand over the tiled ground until there was a sudden click, “Aha! Here it is!” He pulled up one of the tiles, then a few other ones. He dropped down the large hole that the tiles were concealing. “It’s a good thing those advisors told me about this escape tunnel. Psh. Not like anyone could take me anyways.” Within a second or two, he was already through the two mile tunnel. His agility was great, as were some of his other qualities.

Looking up a long hole, there wasn’t much light other than the light from Lance’s hand. He climbed up the hole. He kicked up some dirt, fungus, and grass that was over the top of the hole. “Ha! Hahahahaha! I’m finally out of that place!!!” He stuck his hand down the tunnel. An enormous lightning bolt shot out and ran down the hole, completely destroying any chance of going back down or going back up.
Last edited by UberCaligo on Fri Apr 14, 2006 7:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Elemental Warriors - Chapter 2 is up! (not completed)

Postby UberCaligo » Fri Apr 14, 2006 4:08 pm

Come on people. Comments would be nice.
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Postby Darkness_calls » Fri Apr 14, 2006 4:12 pm

There will always be times where no comments will be made ... but for a comment:
The story is heading in a good direction, keep it up.
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Re: Elemental Warriors - Chapter 2 is up! (not completed)

Postby UberCaligo » Fri Apr 14, 2006 6:53 pm

Heh, thanks. I guess one fan/nice person is better than none at all.
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