That's right, I've written a film script. Well, a short film script. This is the first time I've done one without collaborating with someone else, so it's probably pretty shit. So I thought I'd put it up here and ask my bestest best friends to look over it and give me some CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.
1. Ext. Day Street
A man named LARRY sits on a bench, a box of chocolates in his lap
I think it was Tom Hanks, or possibly a character
He played in a movie, who said “Life is like a box
Of chocolates, because you never know what you’re
Going to get.” But these days, it says right on the box
Because if you’re allergic to something in the chocolate
You’ll sue them
A beautiful girl, EMMA, comes and sits next to him
Are those for your girlfriend?
Oh, no. I don’t have a girlfriend. I just like chocolates.
Can I have one?
EMMA reaches over and takes one without looking at what it is
Wait, you don’t have any allergies, do you?
Yeah, peanuts. But in life, you’ve gotta take risks
She puts the chocolate in her mouth. They smile at each other. EMMA’s eyes suddenly go wide
Oh, God, it had peanuts.
2. Int. Day. LARRY’s House
Larry pours some soup into a bowl and puts it in the microwave.
Thank you so much.
Not at all.
This is a lovely place.
Not at all.
Um…this might seem a bit forward, but do you have
Um…well, sort of…
Wow. I always thought something like that would be
Well, he’s just this guy I’ve been seeing on and off since
High school. We’ll go out for a couple of months, and
When he finds something “better” he moves on, but it
never seems too long before he comes back, and I always
let him come back.
A short silence
Sounds like you need to lose that zero and get yourself
A hero. (suddenly coming back to himself) But I guess it’s
Hard to find someone like that, hey?
Not as hard as you might think.
They smile at each other
Sometimes, things don’t go completely as planned.
Like if you go to get a box of your favourite chocolates
And you pick up the wrong box. But that isn’t always
A bad thing. Like if you got a box that was full of turkish
Delight. Unless you don’t like turkish delight, but I do,
The microwave beeps loudly. LARRY ducks out of fear
(getting back up) Son of a bitch. That thing always
Scares the crap out of me.
3. Ext. Day. Outside EMMA’s house
EMMA stands just in the door way, LARRY on the path leading to the door.
They stand in an awkward silence.
LARRY starts back towards his car. He walks back to EMMA.
Can I call you sometime?
Yeah, yeah I’d like that.
They smile at each other. LARRY starts towards his car again. He walks back to EMMA again
Can I get your number, or…?
EMMA grabs a piece of paper, writes down her phone number and hands it to LARRY
LARRY starts back down the path again. EMMA shuts the door. LARRY pulls out a wrapped chocolate from his pocket. Without looking, he unwraps it and sticks it in his mouth. He stops suddenly.
In life, you’ve gotta take risks.
LARRY runs back up to the door and bangs loudly. EMMA opens the door.
My life has been like a box of chocolates. But I think
Now it’s going to be like two boxes of chocolates.
LARRY grabs her and kisses her passionately. He lets go, and EMMA stands completely still.
It had peanuts, didn’t it?
EMMA nods her head slowly. LARRY walks her inside.
Two boxes without peanuts.
This is just a first draft, I plan to make heaps of changes. But what do you all think?
Mac users edited it out of the Bible, but the eleventh commandment was "Thou shalt get a proper computer, for fuck's sake."
Vis wrote:Cole got owned by Larry. Sweet.
Liberal Arts Quantum Physics: Light's damned fast and not everything is as it seems. Space is funny like that. The end.