My First-ever fan-fic.....BE GENTLE!!! (now in proper forum)

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My First-ever fan-fic.....BE GENTLE!!! (now in proper forum)

Postby SemiJuggalo » Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:50 pm

Semi here!


I would like to present to you a story that's been in my mind for the past few months. Since I've started reading the comic, I've been amazed by the way all these different cartoon characters have been tied together. I even wanted to contribute to the progression of the storyline, especially with Invader Zim characters being a part of the story.

How does Zim fit into the Darkstar Council and Black Eden? That's what I've been trying to piece together for a long time now. I even pitched a few scenario ideas to B-man himself, and he seemed to be interested in my help writing Zim into the story.

So I began brainstorming on the scenarios I imagined......until I came up with a full-fledged fan-fic! Heh, how ironic that my first fan-fic is one that is based upon another. Anyway, without further ado and such...

Here it is.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zim's New Assignment of DOOM


A Powerpuff Girls Doujinshi Sidestory


Written by Marcus "SemiJuggalo" Malone


Based on the 'Powerpuff Girls Doujinshi' fan-comic by Vinson "Bleedman" Ngo


LEGAL CRAP

Zim and all other related characters are (c) Jhonen Vasquez

Powerpuff Girls are (c) Craig McCracken

Vexus, the Cluster, and Smitus are (c) Rob Renzetti

Dr. X is (c) Bleedman

Nool is (c) Kainsword17


NOTE: This is my first-ever attempt at writing a fan-fiction, let-alone a fan-fic based on another fan-fiction. I'd appreciate any criticism, but go easy on me. Writing is NOT my cup-of-tea, although I did work rather hard on this story, so no flaming, please. In fact, I'm open to suggestions as to how i can improve it. Maybe I'll submit this to Bleedman, should the day arrives that he decides to focus on Zim.
As for the story itself, this is basically MY thoughts on how the Darkstar Council joined forces with Dr. X and how they managed to recruit Zim in their group (whose loyalties lie with the Tallest ).

Read on and lemme know what you think......



The story begins with a panoramic view of the techno-organic realm known as Black Eden, All is quiet, except for the sound of a screeching voice ranting out-loud to himself. Then, we get to see the one responsible for the nonstop rambling... a short, green-skinned extraterrestrial humanoid with a pair of black antennae and red, jelly-like eyes. However, his features are concealed by a plastic shower cap, a pair of high-tech goggles, yellow rubber gloves, greenish-brown denim overalls, and he also appears to be wearing a Kleenex box on each foot. This loud little alien calls himself ZIM and he's... mopping.

"GRRR, This is ridiculous! I, an Elite Irken Invader, reduced to be nothing more than a mere... custodial drone! This simply should not be... for I AM ZIM!!! Manual labor is beneath a soldier of my caliber!"

Zim puts down the mop and thinks to himself for a moment...

"Since when did the Tallest come to this decision?! Why would they think that I would need to join forces with local contacts?! ZIM needs no assistance in conquering these DISGUSTING STINK-BEASTS!"

--CUT AWAY TO NEXT SCENE--

*FLASHBACK*

Cluster Prime, a planet somewhere far off in the darkest regions of space. Inhabited by a race of war-mongering, insectoid machines who only seek to enslave and/or destroy all organic life forms. Their ruler is Queen Vexus, who has already brought countless other worlds to their knees.

"Captain Nool, report! What is the current status of the invasion of Earth?"

Seated upon her throne, we see Vexus herself, whose appearance is that of a tall, thin, female humanoid with yellow, cat-like eyes, a pair of wasp-like wings, black knee-high boots, and horizontal greenish-gray and yellow stripes decorating her Egyptian-style headdress and thighs. Her appearance almost resembles that of a queen bee, which is fitting since most of the Cluster robots are insectoid in appearance. She sits upon her metallic throne, awaiting the arrival of Nool, a loyal servant and one of the most powerful soldiers in the Cluster army.

"Yes, my queen. How may I serve you?"

Nool reports to the queen's throne room. His appearance is unmistakeable. He boasts a green, metal exoskeleton with broad shoulders and two foot-long spikes protruding from each side of his back. He has a very narrow waist that gets wider at the pelvic area. Instead of legs, Nool has a pair of 3-foot jointed limbs with a point at the end of each one. They seem to allow him to hover without touching the ground. Nool also appears to be missing a neck (and a head for that matter), thus it appears as if his face (which consists of a pair of glowing yellow eyes, four smaller eyes, a small, fang-filled mouth, and a long thin horn, on his forehead), was just constructed directly onto the chest plate of his torso. The most distinguishing feature on his body are his arms, which are actually a pair of hydraulic tendrils.
The left tendril has a set of razor-sharp shears that work like pincers. On his right tendril is a four-bladed, fan-like buzz saw.

"We seem to have stumbled upon a bit of a problem, my queen. It seems that there may be more than just the XJ9 Unit standing in the way of planet Earth's destruction," said to Nool, with his right saw hand placed across his chest.

Vexus, did not appear to be pleased by this news at all. She then responded in a raised voice, "What?! You mean to tell me that besides that little girl robot, that something else on that pitiful rock of biological infestation actually poses a threat to me? To the Cluster empire?"

"Yes, my queen," Nool responded.

"Surely, you do not mean the incompetent Earthlings' military forces?"

"Why, of course not. Up until now, the automaton known as XJ9 has been the only thing on that planet capable of repelling our forces multiple times. However, upon further examination of the planet, my sources have gathered that there are beings on that planet capable of performing great feats of power and destruction."

Vexus, now slightly curious, "......I'm listening... Continue."

"Yes, it is true, my queen. There are actually ORGANIC beings on the earth who possess powers greater than even the most destructive weapons . Some of them even use their abilities to attempt conquering their very own world!"

"Interesting, but if this is true, why haven't these humans destroyed themselves by now?"

Nool plays a holographic video that features various shots of costumed heroes. "That is because there are those who use their unique abilities to protect their world. Many have even rallied others together to uphold their system of laws and to maintain order."

"Hmm, it seems that adding this planet to our empire will prove more challenging than I realized. Not only must we deal with XJ9, but if word gets out to either of these groups of... super friends... we will definitely have our hands full. What is your plan to rectify this situation?"

Nool continues, "Strange you should ask, because my drones have discovered a message from an Earthling--well, at least I think it's an Earthling--and he has offered to assist us in conquering the Earth."

"Hmph! How does a mere Earthling plan to assist the Cluster?" Vexus asked, unimpressed.

"I could play the message for you if I may..."

"Very well" said Vexus.

Nool plays another hologram. We then see the holographic image of a tall orange-skinned creature, which appears to be male. He has a pair of yellow eyes and flames burning on the the top of his head. However, most disturbing are the four, large yellow eyes on his torso.

"Queen Vexus... obviously, we've never met before, so I'll introduce myself. You may simply refer to me as X. I have a special proposition for you. For too long, I have watched various forces, terrestrial and extraterrestrial alike, fighting over the control of planet Earth. For my own reasons, I, too have expressed my own interest in this world's conquest, which is why I have formed Black Eden. As I see it, it is a rather pointless struggle for power that will only end in these groups destroying each other before those who uphold justice do it first. This brings me to my proposition ... Join Black Eden. I am currently in the process of gathering those who share our goals, all for the singular purpose of conquering this pitiful world! With our combined forces, we shall destroy all of the "heroes" who oppose us, as well as your nemesis, XJ9. If it is any incentive, I know of an Irken Invader stationed here on Earth that can be of great use to our cause. As you know, the Irkens have access to some of the most advanced technology in the universe. Of course, It will be beneficial to you, as well, but the decision is entirely yours. Think about it."

End of hologram...

"What shall we do? Ignore him, perhaps?"

"No. I wouldn't do this under ordinary circumstances, but I say we should take up his offer."

"Are you certain, my Queen?" Nool asked confused by his queen's decision.

"Yes, I am very certain. This could be a very good opportunity for us, Nool. We shall join forces with this "X" character for now. Besides, after we destroy XJ9, along with everyone else who dares to oppose us, we can always just destroy him later..."

"I see, brilliant idea, my Queen!"

"For the longest time, my most powerful forces have failed me! Even that fool, Smitus, who is supposed to be one of the greatest commanders in the Cluster army, has failed to destroy little Jennifer on more than one separate occasion! This may be the perfect chance to see just what you and the rest of my elite unit, the Darkstar Council, is truly capable of! You will notify the rest of Council that you are to rendezvous with our new friend on Earth!"

Nool then says, "Very well, my queen. We will not disappoint you. As for the aforementioned Earth-based Irken Invader, leave that to
me."

"Good, now leave me."

"As you wish..." Said Nool, who bows and exit's Vexus's throne room without another word.

"Yes... we will join with Black Eden and dispose of Jennifer and these other threats to the Cluster... and once we've done that, we will literally eliminate the competition. Soon, nothing shall stand in our way... NOTHING!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!"

--NEXT CUT-AWAY--

Elsewhere in space, is the Irken Armada, a vast fleet consisting of thousands (maybe MILLIONS) of battleships traveling the universe. All for the glory of the Irken Empire, the Armada lays waste to all who dare stand in their way. The heart of this formidable force is the Massive. The largest, most powerful ship in the Irken Armada and personal transport vessel of the Irken Empire's rulers, the Almighty Tallest.

Aboard the Massive, we see a large circular room full of computer consoles and technicians operating the various high-tech devices, This area is clearly the bridge of the Massive and a pair of thin, lanky Irken males observe their surrounding from a floating circular platform in the center.

--IRKEN FACTS: THE TALLEST-- Planet Irk's hierarchy is based on height and the taller the Irken, the greater the position in society he/she will be given. In this case, there are currently TWO Irkens who rule simultaneously due to being the exact same height. And as their title implies, they are indeed "almighty" (well, as far as the Irkens themselves are concerned). They are dressed in the same garments that are traditionally worn by whomever is the Tallest--long robes equipped with hover-belts that allow the Tallest to levitate about a foot above ground level, because Irken society states that the Tallest shouldn't have to walk on the same ground that the lesser Irkens do. In short, "Height means might!"

Suddenly one of the computer consoles begin making noises...

"BREEP BREEP" "BREEP BREEP" "BREEP BREEP"

"Incoming transmission," announced one of the operators, viewing the console monitor.

"Hrrmph?! Whahhff?!!" mumbled Tallest Purple (not really a name, but he is called that by IZ creators and fans because of his purple eyes and matching robe). He can't seem to speak clearly as he appears to have shoved a number of doughnuts into his mouth.

"Pay attention! We got a call!" said Tallest Red (like Purple, except his eyes are red, as is his robe) as he slapping Purple in the back of the head, knocking most of the partially-chewed doughnuts from his mouth.

"HEY! What's the big idea?! I was TOO paying attention! I was just eating and you hit me!" Said Purple in a whiny voice.

"Shut up! I said we got a call!" yelled Red.

"You just told me to "SHUT UP," you jerk!" Purple continue to whine.

Red then replied (sarcastically) "Yeah, I know. Anyway, where's the transmission coming from?"

"It is from Earth, sirs," answered the operator.

"Oh, great... it's probably Zim...AGAIN." Said Red, annoyed.

"That Zim... We REALLY should've sent him to a planet of boiling oil or something," said Purple, also annoyed.

"Oh, well... patch it through and let's just get it over with," Red sighed.

The monitor blinks on and we see an image of Nool onscreen.

Red sighs, "Okay, Zim... What is it this time?"

"Err, that's... not Zim, just some funny-looking metal-guy," says Purple.

Red, who is now bewildered, replies, "Metal-guy?â€
Last edited by SemiJuggalo on Tue Jul 12, 2005 2:21 pm, edited 3 times in total.
"You may have won the battle but I'm out of ammunition!" --The Four Postmen

Instead of constantly complaining about 4Kids, why not take action? Why not stop watching their butchered anime programming? You're only providing them with more undeserved ratings! That's what I did... after a while, actually.

I actually tried to give the 4Kids version of One Piece a chance, I REALLY DID! However, as the show progressed, I grew sicker and sicker of all the glaring edits and horrid voices! So, I've decided to avoid watching any 4Kids-related shows, which is a shame because the new Ninja Turtles cartoon is the only 4Kids show worth watching!

Saturday mornings are dead to me... way to go, Al Kahn!
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Postby GridsNaranek » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:13 am

I've never actually seen shows like Zim or MLAATR so this will be a good reference for sequels to my fics. If you don't mind, of course.
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Postby Vulcan » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:14 am

You have never seen Zim?
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Postby SemiJuggalo » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:22 am

Griddles wrote:I've never actually seen shows like Zim or MLAATR

Then you don't know what you're missing...

I'm actually impressed that my first fic already inspired another fan-fic writer!

I'm flattered, really.
"You may have won the battle but I'm out of ammunition!" --The Four Postmen

Instead of constantly complaining about 4Kids, why not take action? Why not stop watching their butchered anime programming? You're only providing them with more undeserved ratings! That's what I did... after a while, actually.

I actually tried to give the 4Kids version of One Piece a chance, I REALLY DID! However, as the show progressed, I grew sicker and sicker of all the glaring edits and horrid voices! So, I've decided to avoid watching any 4Kids-related shows, which is a shame because the new Ninja Turtles cartoon is the only 4Kids show worth watching!

Saturday mornings are dead to me... way to go, Al Kahn!
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Postby GridsNaranek » Tue Jul 12, 2005 1:24 am

Who is that writer? I'll have to check out his/her work.

Nah, I used to have cable but we got rid of it before IZ and MLAATR came on. It might come to free-to-air TV in Aus one day, but until then I gotta get info off others. If it weren't for Bleed, I wouldn't know the craziness that is Gir.
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Postby Joker-Undead » Tue Jul 12, 2005 4:46 am

I wonder when the other members of the Council will be in this story?

Added after 1 minutes:

Well, how about Samantha's part in the story?
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Postby SemiJuggalo » Tue Jul 12, 2005 10:32 am

Kainsword17 wrote:I wonder when the other members of the Council will be in this story?

Added after 1 minutes:

Well, how about Samantha's part in the story?


That depends, I wrote this fan-fic baded on what we've already learned from B-man's story. And we still don't know very much about Samantha, other than what you've mentioned on your Darkstar Council design sheet at DevArt.

I know that aside from being able to pilot mechs, Samantha has some unnatural powers due to her selling her soul to the Shadowkhan. And Montray III apparently has the ability to summon Shadowkhan warriors.

B-man's comic has also shown us that both Sam and Montray have some sort of bond because of this.

And how about my description of Nool? Did I describe him accurately enough?
"You may have won the battle but I'm out of ammunition!" --The Four Postmen

Instead of constantly complaining about 4Kids, why not take action? Why not stop watching their butchered anime programming? You're only providing them with more undeserved ratings! That's what I did... after a while, actually.

I actually tried to give the 4Kids version of One Piece a chance, I REALLY DID! However, as the show progressed, I grew sicker and sicker of all the glaring edits and horrid voices! So, I've decided to avoid watching any 4Kids-related shows, which is a shame because the new Ninja Turtles cartoon is the only 4Kids show worth watching!

Saturday mornings are dead to me... way to go, Al Kahn!
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Postby Joker-Undead » Tue Jul 12, 2005 12:00 pm

SemiJuggalo wrote:
Kainsword17 wrote:I wonder when the other members of the Council will be in this story?

Added after 1 minutes:

Well, how about Samantha's part in the story?


That depends, I wrote this fan-fic baded on what we've already learned from B-man's story. And we still don't know very much about Samantha, other than what you've mentioned on your Darkstar Council design sheet at DevArt.

I know that aside from being able to pilot mechs, Samantha has some unnatural powers due to her selling her soul to the Shadowkhan. And Montray III apparently has the ability to summon Shadowkhan warriors.

B-man's comic has also shown us that both Sam and Montray have some sort of bond because of this.

And how about my description of Nool? Did I describe him accurately enough?


Cool description of Nool dude. And maybe you might do a story about Samantha and Montray as a couple because of this bond idea of yours and might have a little adventure fighting some enemies. So, any comments^_^?
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Postby SemiJuggalo » Tue Jul 12, 2005 12:34 pm

About the apparent bond, save your thanks for B-man. Maybe that's not what was supposed to be implied but I that's what I got from it.

Again, because of the Shadowkhan thing, I figured those two would naturally hang out or something.
"You may have won the battle but I'm out of ammunition!" --The Four Postmen

Instead of constantly complaining about 4Kids, why not take action? Why not stop watching their butchered anime programming? You're only providing them with more undeserved ratings! That's what I did... after a while, actually.

I actually tried to give the 4Kids version of One Piece a chance, I REALLY DID! However, as the show progressed, I grew sicker and sicker of all the glaring edits and horrid voices! So, I've decided to avoid watching any 4Kids-related shows, which is a shame because the new Ninja Turtles cartoon is the only 4Kids show worth watching!

Saturday mornings are dead to me... way to go, Al Kahn!
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Posts: 488
Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2004 2:30 pm
Location: Somewhere cursing Keiji Inafune for pulling the extras from the MMX Collection.
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