Vars: Stigma | Original | Ongoing |

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Vars: Stigma | Original | Ongoing |

Postby Varspool » Sat Jan 11, 2014 12:32 am

Okay shit, I'm not a big fan of writing, but this is to help me organize where the storyline is for my upcoming project: Stigma. There will be four 'stages' such as Repetition, Comatose, Recuperation, and Metastasize. So the writing isn't going to be polished, but I'll try to make it somewhat easy to understand.
The beginning will be hard to catch up with, since it's slow, but you'll soon see why.
Triggers though, such as suicide, drug abuse and some more that I'll add on.
------------
STIGMA
I was about 17 when I contemplated the thought of dying, it was barely my birthday but I no longer saw the reason to live.
My routine was useless, worthless. Everything I did was for nothing.
I has hoped to live a more exciting life where I didn't see fault in my actions, all my friends disappeared, right through my fingers. I may sound "emo" or "ungrateful" but it hurts, it really does.
What I was about to do, would probably be for the best of everyone who had known me.

--------------
:REPETITION:
~CHAPTER ONE~
Routine

When days merge into one, the reason soon decays. The mind bends and warps, just to keep up with reality. Life tied with a routine, restrictions which soon tire the body.

Kylie woke up to the sound of her alarm, which was set at exactly on 6:30 a.m. She sighed, and got ready for another day.

Soon become to realize that not every single human life is precious, you are the same.

Looking around for her toothbrush, Kylie proceeded through her normal routine, something was off, usually she would have everything ready, but for some reason, she had missed something.

The answer had soon made it's way into her head as soon as she was halfway down the street. My homework. Mere laziness prevented her from making her way back, she shook off the nagging voices. Maybe if I'm lucky enough, they'll push the due date to the next day.

She got on the bus like the routine had planned and continued, despite her head growing light from thinking of the consequences of not bringing her homework. To some people, this might seem something you shouldn't be fretting over too much, but it just wasn't right. All that work for nothing practically.

Going to school wasn't hard, but it was horrendously time-consuming. Everything Kylie did was either too much or too little, there was no in between. Her friends were okay, but sometimes Kylie felt as if they didn't actually care much about her, like she was their unwanted guest. Kylie was okay with that, it not like they minded.
The day was almost over, work, work, and more work. None of this seem to overwhelm Kylie at the slightest. All the kids groaned when the teacher announced more homework, and it was only Monday. The girl sat there, only listening to the instructor drone on and on about the lesson they were on.

Humans are amazing, they stay sane by following a plan, over and over. They never get tired of it. New experiences here and there, but they stay constant.

Pencils scratched against papers and the room was silent. Except for a couple of kids who Kylie identified to be Alexis and her little "gang". They never got their stuff done and when they do put effort, it end up in complete shit. They're loud and inconsiderate, Kylie would always cringe when they would do some audacious act against the teacher or other classmates.

Wood clattered on the floor.

Clare reached down to pick up her pencil, it seems like she does that every class. The familiar hollow patter as it rolled off her desk and onto the cold, white floor replayed in Kylie's head. She could hear it hit the floor in her head before the pencil actually hit the surface. Her murmurs were heard as she reached down to retrieve her pencil.

The end of the day flew by and Kylie was left to finish the rest of her day by sitting up in her room, drawing or whatever was in arms length away from her. Kylie was always making sure she could hear her mother, who constantly called to her when needed. Kylie soon grew annoyed because of it, she never got the time to sit down and relax. She loved her mom dearly, but the fact that she always needed her help was a little too much. Kylie already had work to do.
That Monday slowly merged into the next day, as Kylie woke up the next day to get ready for the day. Tuesday, Wednesday, the days seem to skip as Friday passed by alarmingly quick.

Some people see past their routine, they begin to realize how useless they are without it. Some begin to change.

Kylie didn't go to school for four days next week, a fever had striked her hard.
The routine had stopped. Days went by painfully slow. Due to her headaches, Kylie had not been able to sleep, she started to hallucinate. A figure went by Kylie's door, a blur. Too dizzy to move, Kylie had stayed where she was, eyelids soon fluttering closed. She could hear voices and she had a feeling someone was looming over her. Incoherent voices were heard, none were familiar. Ignoring them, she snoozed off.

If she wasn't going to be doing anything productive, she might as well give her body a rest.

As if time caught up with her, she went to school on Friday. It was all the same.
It was almost as if the same conversations had taken place, the same events occurred. Just as if she went back a week.
She hadn't missed anything.

At lunch Kylie sat down next to her "friend", Neil. He barely acknowledged her presence and had his back turned towards her. Not minding this at the slightest, Kylie started on eating. There are times when her and Neil would have something to say, but Neil's friends were there with him. They weren't really fond of Kylie, she would normally shrug them off, she thought she wouldn't have to worry about them.

They were having tons of fun sitting there, laughing at the stupid jokes Neil would come up with. A tingling sensation surged through her stomach, one that she had never experienced before. She stopped eating, getting up to throw away her tray, she then sat down, not by Neil, but on the other side of the cafeteria. Kylie peered over to the table she had previously sat at and seen that no one noticed. The tingling made it's way to her throat. Worry clouded her thought process.
Thinking about this, Kylie hadn't noticed that it was time to be dismissed to next period.

During seminar, grades had been passed out. When Kylie received hers, she felt nothing. It was the same, all A's. Kids around her hooted or complained about their grades. But Kylie sat there, not knowing how to feel. Should she feel great about listening to directions and doing her work? The same things that she had been doing since she first enrolled into school?
Alexis passed by her, eyes scanning her half sheet of paper. Snatching Kylie's grades, she snorted, taking the paper to show her friends. Kylie couldn't even watch, for she was deep in thought.

"This bitch got all A's, what a loser." After a couple minutes of snarky insults directed towards Kylie, Alexis had shoved the paper back in Kylie's hands before packing up for the bell. "Fuckin' nerd!" She spat. The kids around her giggled before walking out the room.
Kylie was the last one to leave, while she packed up, the paper had fallen out of her grasp. She was hesitant on picking it up since it didn't have much value to her. But she knew her mom would want to see it. Kylie gathered her belongings quickly before she left the room. She made sure she didn't forget anything this time.

However, this was the last day of Kylie's routine.
Last edited by Varspool on Sun Jan 12, 2014 12:52 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Stigma

Postby Sigment » Sat Jan 11, 2014 1:34 am

Hmm. Very interesting. I gotta say, I like this. You're a pretty good writer, Var.
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Re: Stigma

Postby Birdofterror » Sat Jan 11, 2014 1:37 am

Sigment wrote:Hmm. Very interesting. I gotta say, I like this. You're a pretty good writer, Var.
What Sigment here said.

It took me a while to read this, but I did it in one sitting. It seemed very interesting, so I gave it a whirl. I found it to be enthralling, especially near the end. Keep up the work! I would like to see how this all ends up.
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Re: Stigma

Postby Varspool » Sat Jan 11, 2014 3:24 am

Sigment wrote:Hmm. Very interesting. I gotta say, I like this. You're a pretty good writer, Var.


Thank you for the comment, Sigment.
It's a bit different than what I would usually write up, (if I ever do write) but I'm just doing a little experimenting.

Birdofterror wrote:It took me a while to read this, but I did it in one sitting. It seemed very interesting, so I gave it a whirl. I found it to be enthralling, especially near the end. Keep up the work! I would like to see how this all ends up.


Thanks! Yeah, I didn't really mean to extend the chapter for that long, hopefully I didn't miss anything.
And, will do! I'm looking forward to continuing the story.
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Re: Stigma

Postby Varspool » Sun Jan 12, 2014 1:36 am

This chapter is short, and a little boring. Might seem rushed, but then again, not polished.
------------------------
:REPETITION:
~CHAPTER TWO~
Change


Suddenly, she awoke, and found herself in her own mind. They had warned her to stay away from the dark, unfortunately, she didn’t listen.
...
“Y’know, maybe if you eased up a bit, people would probably like you more. You... you just seem so isolated and you’re a bit rude.” Chelsea suggested. She didn’t stop there, Chelsea just kept on talking, almost as if she had a list of complaints for Kylie’s behavior.

The bus was full of hollering teenagers, Kylie had no desire on ‘loosening up’ just for people like them. It’s not like they mattered anyway. In a few years, Kylie would never have to see them again, why should she worry about them?

Another thing that bothered Kylie, was the fact that people have the nerve to go and try to change her ways. She was perfectly fine before.
Everyone, they’re so selfish.

“Erm, dude. Sorry to interrupt you, but we’re at the school.” Chelsea nudged a little harder on Kylie, which only made Kylie glance for a mere second.

“I get it, just leave.” Kylie said. Chelsea only glared for a moment, obviously offended. She pulled her hair back, then picked up her purse and exited the bus.
Knowing she couldn’t linger in the bus, aware that she’ll receive a tardy for sitting around, Kylie left shortly.

The day went by like always, nothing changed. Just more work, papers that needed to be turned in by the next day. Kylie would also need to practice more for orchestra, the same music they had played for three months. Kylie knew all the songs by heart, sometimes when it grew quiet in the classrooms, Kylie would silently hum the songs in her head. Sometimes she imagined holding her violin, with poise. Even though she knew she was just a second violinist, she had imagined of getting better, perhaps enough to put her in with the firsts. The thought was absurd, for she had to go by her routine. She shouldn’t strive to change it at all.

Pushing the thought away, she focused on her work, only ten minutes remaining on the clock.

When Kylie went home, instead of studying for the tests, she laid down and fell asleep. A sudden change in the schedule.

It was almost as if she awoke on a different universe, with a dim, comforting atmosphere, and trees that lined down the cobblestone path. The breeze was light, but it was cold. Like if she had jumped into the freezer.

The mind is wonderful, it perceives things that may not even exist. Sadly, this is also why people rot from the inside.

For some reason, Kylie felt light, as if something was lifted off her shoulders. The air was clean, with the scent of nature from around. The stones pushed on her bare feet as she crept down the trail. This place was familiar, and Kylie could admit, that she could probably stay here forever.

But that would change the routine.

She had realized this, before she could turn back, a meow was heard. It turns out that Kylie was not alone, presuming it was a cat, would also be wandering in the forest. Following where the noise came from, she veered off the trail and into the trees, music faintly played, a tune that Kylie could remember. It was a song that she had played in orchestra. A lovely tune, it had a serene feel to it, the forest felt like it changed, so that the atmosphere would fit the song.

Kylie pushed around the trees and found herself in an open field, flowers illuminated at her presence, almost like they were greeting her. The flowers were a lovely purple hue, with yellow specks, fireflies filled the night sky with a warm radiance. Soft humming noises were heard, coming from the trees behind. She had completely forgot about the cat. Kylie felt overwhelmed with the environment, it was so unreal. Pinching herself a couple times, she came to the conclusion that this was real. The fireflies had circled around her, before darting off in the open. Following the swarm, they had formed words in the dark sky.

S T A Y

A little curious, she had replayed the words, “Stay?” Lights moved around and they formed into another message.

D O N T W A K E U P

It was a bit harder to read, the lights soon began to dim, the forest, the flowers, they disappeared. Voices mumbled words Kylie couldn’t understand. Kylie shut her eyes, the voices grew louder, more agitated.
When she had opened them, she realized that she returned. To her room, her mom loomed over her form.
She was obviously a bit pissed off, her eyes were slightly narrowed in annoyance.

“Kylie! You didn’t do the dishes! Come on, get up. If you sleep now, you won’t be able to sleep tonight.” Rubbing her tired eyes, Kylie had apologized before getting up to head down to the kitchen to do the dishes like she was told to do. She was a bit frightened by her mom’s yelling. But then again, this doesn’t usually happen.

“You’re old enough to where I don’t have to constantly remind you!” Her mom bellowed from the top of the stairs.
She was right, though. Kylie should’ve stayed awake, doing something productive, like homework. Peering over at the clock on the stove, it was only 3:30. That means...

Kylie was only asleep for twenty minutes. If not, less. So much had happened in such a short period of time.
Glancing at the dishes, she unloaded them quickly. After, her sister walked in, ignoring Kylie and going straight to the dishwasher, only to start loading dirty dishes.

Kylie’s siblings, Charley and Anna, pretty much didn’t do anything besides messing around. Charley was notorious for causing trouble in, wherever he went. Worst part, he didn’t care, he never learned from his mistakes. It felt like he meant to hinder people whenever he had the chance.
Anna was the opposite, she was distant, her priorities were a jumbled mess, she’s confused most of the time and never had the ambition to try new things. Ask her to find you something, and she would most likely quit before she even starts. Anna was unreliable, and that was a trait Kylie found to be the worst.

If people thought you couldn’t get stuff done on your own accord, they would’ve gave up on your entire existence.

Dinner time came and passed, Kylie spent the rest of her day drawing. However, she examined her doodles and sighed.
Why can’t I draw something... something fascinating. All my drawings are so bland!

She remembered the forest, the unreal feeling returned. Surely she would someday create something as colorful and meaningful as that.
Putting away her supplies, she got up to start on her nightly routine, cleaning up for the night and such. Kylie made sure her papers were organized for the next day, the essay she completed a while ago sat on her desk was now filed nicely in her binder. Climbing into bed shortly after, she then fell asleep rather quickly, dreaming of the forest, the song, the flowers and their welcoming lights. It was a peaceful night.

The day she would create something beautiful, would soon come.
Last edited by Varspool on Wed Jan 15, 2014 8:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Stigma

Postby Birdofterror » Sun Jan 12, 2014 11:03 am

Such a disturbing beauty, that forest. Another great job, this didn't feel that rushed at all. My favorite line must have been "The mind is wonderful, it perceives things that may not even exist. Sadly, this is also why people rot from the inside." That's some true stuff right there.

Keep up the great work! I have a lot on my plate, a lot of literature to read, so I'll definitely get around to reading your further updates, but I may not 'comment' on a lot of them. Just know that I'll be here reading!
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Re: Vars: Stigma | Original | Ongoing |

Postby Comic Kitten » Thu Jan 16, 2014 3:05 am

Varspool wrote:Okay shit, I'm not a big fan of writing...

For someone not a fan of writing, you sure seem to have a talent for it!!! Very interesting to read.
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Re: Vars: Stigma | Original | Ongoing |

Postby Varspool » Thu Jan 16, 2014 10:36 pm

^ Thanks for your guy's comments, I really do appreciate them.
Since I want to catch up with the drawing part for Stigma, I'll probably update till I'm all caught up.
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