archrival fanfic: the uknown hero

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Postby Archrival » Thu May 11, 2006 11:22 am

no thres harder thn doctor x in this bell is weak compared till later
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Postby Emerald Emblem » Thu May 11, 2006 11:23 am

O.K. then
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Postby Timer » Thu May 11, 2006 11:27 am

PPGD Fan wrote:that warren seems a bit too strong in my opinion
he could have taken at least one hit
this makes him seem like he could be a match for Dr X on his own
but aside from that it is good


ouch burn

i designed warren to be that way, his main weakness is that he looses control of his powers when hes angery

also like most wizards he is terribly weak physically
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Postby Emerald Emblem » Thu May 11, 2006 11:31 am

Warren is your origional character Timer?
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Postby Archrival » Thu May 11, 2006 11:32 am

its his agility tht blocked all the punches and beam to the stomach sent bell flyin
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Postby Timer » Thu May 11, 2006 11:33 am

Warren is your origional character Timer?


i designed warren a long time ago, he is one of my DnD characters (LV 10 necromancer) and my LARP (live action role play) character, i gave Arch permission to use him
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Postby Archrival » Thu May 11, 2006 11:37 am

yup he did and i upped him a bit im also adding another friends char wen she registers on here
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Re: archrival fanfic: the uknown hero

Postby Archrival » Fri May 12, 2006 12:47 pm

Chapter 3
The unseen guest
Narrator: now with every villain there's an assasin wanting to kill that villain and Zim is no exception to that rule, his assasin goes by the name of kazzan she was trained by dark spirits as a child and can use their ghostly form to hide herself and make her practicaly invisible and can apperate a blade of pure darkness, the power is a source of arcane energy the same as Warren, so as Warren was sneaking around the house he could sense a arcane essense and decided to seek it out, as he got close he could see the arcane outline of Kazzan.
Warren: Halt arcane maiden are you a colleague of Zim's because if you are i will have to teminate you.
Narrator: Kazan turns off her invisiblity and apperates her blade
kazzan: I could say the same to you oh mage of all things gothic
Warren: I am Warren modern necromancer and friend of the hero Archrival.
Kazzan: I am kazzan great assasin of the dark spiritual coult here to assasinate zim and all he stands for
Warren: Ok.....then your on our side we're are to find out what Zim is upto and to stop it
kazzan: Fine i will join your quest to stop the evil Zim, where to Warren?
Warren: Follow me and we shall see
Narrator: So in joining Warren, Archrival and Dib, Kazzan has made great allies to tackle a great foe.
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Postby BG07 » Fri May 12, 2006 1:59 pm

I like the chapter... but I just think a ruthless killer shouldn't be on the good guys' side... other than that good work!
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Postby Archrival » Fri May 12, 2006 2:03 pm

shes an assasin sent by her coult who are on the side of good dark dont mean evil you can be dark but good e.g warren
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Postby BG07 » Fri May 12, 2006 2:05 pm

I see your point, good story nontheless
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Postby Archrival » Fri May 12, 2006 2:06 pm

i thought you might and thnx
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Postby Comic Kitten » Fri May 12, 2006 2:13 pm

Very cool!!! Keep up the story, I'll be waiting! ^_^
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Postby Archrival » Fri May 12, 2006 2:14 pm

yay
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Fanfick

Postby Nyvyan » Fri May 12, 2006 2:27 pm

Cool fanfick, Warren is uber!!!! Keep it up!!!!!
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Postby Timer » Fri May 12, 2006 3:20 pm

keep it up dude, and come and talk with me about the ending
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Re: archrival fanfic: the uknown hero

Postby Archrival » Mon May 15, 2006 7:56 am

chapter 3
part 2: Gir sees all
Narrator: While our heroes go to meet up a watcher sees all that has happened between Kazan and Warren, and that watcher is.....GIR!!!!!
Zim: What happened to you?
Bell: I got beaten up
Zim: By who?
Bell: I didn't get his name and what you upto Girly
Gir: CAMERAS!!!!
Bell: What've you seen so far?
Gir: Four people in the house
Zim: HOW CAN THAT BE MY SECURITY IS IRKEN SEAL TIGHT NOTHING CAN GET IN !!!!!!!!!!
Bell: seems it isn't wait who's that..... THAT LOOKS LIKE THE BLOKE WHO BEAT ME UP!!!!!!!! and whos that bitch with him
Zim: LOOK IT'S DIB! he must be helping them get in, we must tell doctor X of their assault on our plot
Narrator: so the villains have noticed the heroes/heroine attack on the base andset off to tell their boss
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Postby Darkness_calls » Mon May 15, 2006 7:59 am

The plot thickens lol

Really good Archrival ^_^
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Postby Archrival » Mon May 15, 2006 8:03 am

thnx took me a while to think of this part and there's more too come, yay GIRINESS!!!!!!
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Postby Comic Kitten » Mon May 15, 2006 11:55 am

Very good keep it up!
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Postby BG07 » Mon May 15, 2006 2:16 pm

hey length isn't every thing, it's how you use it that counts, ^_^ good work
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Postby Archrival » Mon May 15, 2006 2:18 pm

thnx mre comin soon guys
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Re: archrival fanfic: the uknown hero

Postby Archrival » Tue May 23, 2006 1:12 pm

Chapter 3
Part 3: the bosses turn
Narrator: We last saw our villains go to tell their boss of the attack of the heroes, not knowing of their plan to take obver the world.
Boss: If what you tell me is true then we must speed up our operations for world domination, if they succeed we may not get another chance to take over.
Gir: DOOOM!
Bell: Yes gir doom for them all, what shall we do then daddy?
Daddy: Call me doctor X dear and we are going to meet them head to head right now my minions will carry out the plans to speed up our plots.
Narrator: So the villains set off to counter our heroes meanwhile the heroes meet up in the lounge.
Archrival: Find anything?
Warren: Only this assasin named Kazan that wants to kill Zim by herself
Archrival: A WHAT!!!
Warren: You know what i said
Archrival: Where is she?
Warren: Come out kazan
Kazan: Yes
Archrival: Who do you work for?
Kazan: A dark coult intent of killing Zim and all he stands for
Archrival: Righ.....t
Doctor X: I don't mean to intrude but GET OUT MY FUCKING BASE!!!!!
Archrival: You and what army?
Doctor X: This army GET THEM BELL AND ZIM
Archrival: I'll go for big tall and swearing Warren take Bell and Kazan go for Zim.
Dib: what about me?
Archrival: Do nothing
Narrator: So a battle insued almost all equal for each other, beams go flying, fists punching, high kicks and low kicks all went on in that battle
Doctor X: GET OUT
Archrival: you go first
Bell: I'm GOING TO BEAT YOU THIS TIME BASTARD!!!!
Warren: No chance white maiden
Kazan: I will kill you for my coult
Zim: Must be a crappy coult because I AM INVADER ZIM BEST OF THE IRKEN ELITE
Narrator: After two hours fighting.
Doctor X: The plan is ready retreat RETREAT
Archrival: We showed them but what plan are they on about?
Warren: Well this what we were looking for let's stop it before it can be carried out.
Narrator: so the heroes/heroine follow the villains to see what their plan is.



Soz bout it bein so late i got bored of doin it nyvyan made me carry on so here ya go
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Postby Frostmork » Tue May 23, 2006 1:19 pm

Not to be a ass or something but:
Add some ACTIONS and DESCRIBE more.The FF is just Bla.Bla.Bla bla blabla(Talk.)If you don´t.
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Postby Archrival » Tue May 23, 2006 1:22 pm

ill keep that in mind but i was made today to do this so i hadnt really thought how they fight but ill try for the REALLY big fight scene
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