This forum can be a scary place, 'cause we got lax rules: let's see your war face. Take a breath, and roll the dice, you might find out we're really nice.
Fri Oct 12, 2012 4:25 am
Call up connections, go to voluntary services. Hell, search up something easy on qualifications to tide you over until you find something better. When one meets failure, they can only hope to focus on what other successes they are able to bring out.
Fri Oct 12, 2012 4:47 am
Mr. Sefrol wrote:Still don't have a job. Afraid of not having a home by the end of the month.
You might also try negotiating an extension with your landlord / whatever. Unless people are lining up to have it, it would probably sit for a bit collecting dust anyway. You might as well be there keeping it clean and dry, with a promise to pay the back rent when you have a job. This of course relies on you having a decent relationship with the landlord and prospects for a job in the near future.
Fri Oct 12, 2012 5:11 am
He's my grandfather. But his wife (my step grandmother (if that's what it's called)) is shooting for any chance to kick me and my uncle to the curb. She's... not the best kind of people. Muscled her way into his will and pretty much got everything signed in her name. So while my grandfather thinks with the only brain that's still working to please her, my dad's side of the family is crumbling.
They don't even know i lost my job for fear of them kicking me out right here and now.
Fri Oct 12, 2012 7:20 pm
My knuckles are bleeding. I taped a picture of myself onto my punching bag and punched it into nothing.
Fri Oct 12, 2012 7:23 pm
How's the therapy going?
Fri Oct 12, 2012 7:27 pm
Next appointment on Monday.
Some real deep shit is going down within my social circles. I've been outed on how I emotionally and physically abused a friend.
There is no excuse for it. I punched myself in the face last night and dislocated my jaw.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 4:15 am
Self-harm is the dumbest and most ridiculous thing to do. I actively seek out cutters and self-harming people among my acquaintances in order to avoid being around them or befriending them any further.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 4:26 am
Yeah, breaking your jaw won't fix it man.
You gotta look at what you've done and learn from it, or so I'd wager.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 4:46 am
Q.U. wrote:Self-harm is the dumbest and most ridiculous thing to do. I actively seek out cutters and self-harming people among my acquaintances in order to avoid being around them or befriending them any further.
That's not very helpful bro. They're just seeking control and something that is easier to deal with than emotional pian
Sat Oct 13, 2012 6:52 am
Well sorry to sound mean, but I am not capable of fixing broken people. That's for professionals to do. All I've learned is that such people tend to be a whole lot more trouble than others. I don't consider myself 100% mentally healthy, but actively self-destructive people is where I draw the line.
What annoys me about it is that so many people compromise their physical health for the sake of easing the emotional/psychological pain. You only learn to appreciate every last bit of your health once it starts slipping away. I cannot sympathise with people on this because I don't have such urges, but from my perspective, no matter the mental/emotional anguish, self-harming is one of the worst options to take. And I condemn it.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 9:29 am
Condemn it all you like, but self-harm remains an action taken, I am speaking in extremely flexible and loose circumstances here, usually when a person has fallen at their greatest degree, to such a point that nothing else seems to have any benefit or worth in being an alternative anymore. One could definitely tell an individual undergoing self-harm troubles to stop and go get employed, but the damage and whatever emotional pain they've gone through can make it literally almost impossible for them to see any hope in such alternatives. Of course, this does not mean they're useless or too far gone for any repair.
It simply means they need someone patient and understanding enough to help.
srsly organizations and people actually put efforts for people to understand
this stuff so they can actually know how to help others deal and seek proper help while they can, hate and annoyance may come as a primary emotional reflex on such matters, the reasons behind them being too varied for anyone to actually explain, but they never really do much in the way of making any beneficial progress for anyone
for the record, im more likely being frustrated than angry here
Sat Oct 13, 2012 2:20 pm
QU: If you would like to volunteer, I can always sacrifice your health for my psychological gain. If not, then kindly go fuck a goat.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 2:26 pm
As much as it might sound harsh, QU is definitely in the right if he doesn't want to burden himself with other people's issues and there is no problem if he wants to keep his own life free from that.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 2:33 pm
That's fine, but if so then do try to avoid a place that encourages active communication about issues. That's like walking into a bar and getting pissed alcohol is being served.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 2:36 pm
That's fair but he is entitled to his own opinion and can express it so long as he isn't actively damaging any member looking for help here.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 2:58 pm
He's entitled to it and can express it in any other thread.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 3:10 pm
It is actually mentioned in the OP that you can't come in here and be a dick, so.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 3:10 pm
Sat Oct 13, 2012 7:24 pm
That's fine, but if so then do try to avoid a place that encourages active communication about issues.
I believe cutting yourself or attempting suicide has gone past just having "issues". I could even say that calling the authorities to notify them of the doings of some people here would have been the "socially correct" thing to do, rather than watching people saying how they are going to hurt/kill themselves and ignoring it.
And since I don't really know what true depression is like, I don't believe I've been in such a state before, I cannot be accurate or objective. But as I said, my perspective is simply analytical. If in a dire situation one must do what they can to get themselves out of it, and fix it. Some actions, while temporarily giving relief, will ultimately only pull a person further down, making it even more difficult. It's not just that you're not trying for a solution to your problems by self-harming, you're actually compromising your own ability to recover from it all. And as incorrect as it may be, I end up assuming that a person who actively worsens their own state simply does not want to be helped.
And no, "he/she didn't know it at that time" is not an excuse. What kind of an idiot would not realise what self-harm or suicide attempts will result in?
Nor is "it was in a fit of rage/emotions", because I do believe people posting here are mature enough to be able to realise when their mental state is frail and needs containment.
So no, so far I have not recognised a valid excuse for such a behaviour (other than "it's your body and your life, kill yourself if you want"). If anybody is able to explain clearly enough one real excuse for it then I will gladly change my stance. Though as I said, understanding such things is a challenge for a person who had never experienced such a state.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 8:01 pm
My stance is similar to qu's in regards to self harm tbh.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 8:30 pm
If I'm allowed to post in this thread at all, I actually have some experience with this topic. Not help, just experience.
I'm not going to go Pro or Con on either side, I can see the downs and 'ups' of both, but I tend to lean toward very light self destruction.
It's usually over anger, not depression or sadness or anxiety or anything like that. Long walks and long times spent formulating usually cure those.
I grew up around 'intellectuals' who for some reason, when they got angry took it out on inanimate objects. If these were pillows or punching bags that would be 'fine' I guess, but sometimes holes in walls were made, controllers on gaming systems were broken and windows were completely shattered.
At that point I made a conscious decision over how big the replacement costs and repair bills were getting... so...
Me? I usually... well, embarrassingly enough- bite myself. Usually the fingers, I bite just hard enough to take the focus off the anger and remind me I'm just flesh and blood and life is too short to be mad all the time. Snaps me right out of it. Crazy, I know- but what else is Therapy for?
I never recall an incident of causing permanent or severe harm to myself or others ever, so I think it's successful so far, eh? I'll go now.
Sat Oct 13, 2012 8:59 pm
Hey folks, let's not forget that this is a mod protected thread. If you see something that you think is out of line, let one of us know instead of giving a kneejerk reaction. We want this to be a relatively safe place and having equivalents of "fuck you"s isn't very conducive for the health of the thread.
Bottom line, just let one of us know let us handle it, even if it's a mod who you are reporting.
Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:04 am
What if not everyone thinks someone was doing something the others said the someone was doing?
Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:13 am
In that case let me be more clear. I punched a punching bag until my knuckles bled. Had it not been for the fact that I taped a picture of myself on the punching bag, this would not be considered self harm. I do not consider this self harm. I consider it an exercise in catharsis and sparring.
Sun Oct 14, 2012 12:18 am
When i was 5 years old i used to have this weird fixation with banging my head against the wooden doors of my closet, because it felt rhythmic. Now, if i bang my head against a wall, to me it would be "making sweet rhythms", but it wouldn't mean i am not harming myself by smashing a wall with my head, hurting me, therefore making it still "self harm".
I'm sorry crum, but i don't see how you not seeing self harm as self harm makes it not be self harm when it still is.
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