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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:49 pm

See, that's where he proves he's wrong.

No one is just like another person.

He's given up on you. He's dashed his hopes. He's missing out, not you.

Someone who can't see you for you doesn't deserve you.

There's no such thing as the one.

In this grand world of ours, everyone is our potential one.

So don't fear being alone.

Because I promise that you won't stay that way.

There will be a guy that sees you.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:52 pm

And in the end, the most powerful love is what you should have for yourself.

Love Haru.

I'm sure many people love you as well.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:53 pm

Stand strong.

Hold the good memories, but keep them that way. Memories.

Put him aside, and move on with your life. Even if he tries coming back, you can't wane.

Live Haru.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Lady Haru » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:55 pm

but we've had such good times together
i did the bad thing
if i hadn't done the bad thing everything would be fine
he was my perfect love
i'm the one who hurt him
he has dealt with girls hurting him
he's so cautious of being hurt again
and then i go and hurt him
like the piece of shit i am
why couldn't i just control myself
and be a good girl
Last edited by Lady Haru on Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Lady Haru » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:56 pm

i don't want our good times to end
i don't want to pass him in the hall and he look at me with the loathing i've been seeing in his eyes
he could stab me with the sharpest knife and it wouldn't hurt as much as the look in his eyes

i really liked his eyes
they lit up when he saw me
but now i make them dull
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 8:59 pm

Ok. So you did wrong.

Then you must fix that. But for your sake, not his.

Everyone has pain inside. Everyone's been hurt.

Anyone who just relishes in their pain, though, is selfish.

That's how I know you're not a bad person Haru.

So.

That look of self loathing. Ignore it. Because it's a look of cruelty resigned for someone so focused on their own pain that it's hopeless to try and convince them.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:02 pm

Stay strong, Haru.

Because you can do it.

You've apologized over and over again. It's his fault for not accepting it.

Good moments and good times are fleeting in life, Haru. But they're balanced by the fact that there's many sources for them.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Lady Haru » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:02 pm

he said that too
that i should be good for myself and not him
that i was pathetic for begging him and crying so much
i cry too much, i really do
it makes me so annoying
no matter what i said or did it wasn't right
nothing i could do could make it right
i was trapped in a dead end
but i want to reach him and love him
i want him to love me again

he is the only person to truly make me happy in life
i don't want to lose my only light in all my darkness
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:07 pm

Haru, I'm going to send you my posts in PMs right now.

I'd like to let you in on a secret.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Lady Haru » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:08 pm

every time i get happiness, i destroy it
it's like my brain wants to take the only good things in my life
i posion everything i touch, i poison myself

EDIT: okay
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby ari-6 » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:30 pm

It really is none of my business but I would say, Most people say "I love you" to multiple people in a life time. Whatever you feel towards this person, most likely you will feel the same towards someone else after time. And one day you may look back and realise that the problems that seemed so large, have now faded in your memory. I am really bad at giving advice but I thought if I actually managed to help then it would be worth a try.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Lady Haru » Tue Apr 22, 2014 9:52 pm

thank you for your words
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Millo » Tue Apr 22, 2014 10:19 pm

You can PM me as well Haru. I'm quite an expert when it comes to totally messing something up during a relationship and I can empathize with how you're probably feeling right now.
Have you tried turn it off and on again?
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Wulfespinndel » Wed Apr 23, 2014 12:34 am

Tuor wrote:If you don't know what exactly you want to do it's a good place to take some courses and figure out what you're interested in before declaring your major and then transferring to finish your Bachelors. That's what I did.

Tuor, I'm curious about what you were doing at that time; how many classes did it take you until you found out what you wanted to do and how many classes per quarter did you take? Your post kind of motivated me and I want to seek as much advice as possible.

This week, my Community College had their In-Service day on Monday, so tomorrow is the only day of school I have (I am only taking one class this quarter.) Unfortunately, I haven't told my father about my situation with Financial Aid (we may be a middle class family, but in my eyes, the subject of money is a delicate matter), but as of right now, I feel like I've made my decision and I think I might try to negotiate with him to ensure that I don't drop out.

It's going to be hard for me at the moment because I waited too long to make this decision, and I can guarantee you he's going to be real upset, but there is no turning back now. I have to think for myself.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Tuor » Wed Apr 23, 2014 12:43 am

I usually took 3/4 courses per semester, but I didn't do summer semesters. I was there for…maybe 3 years total? But academically I left after my "Second year" was completed, and it was time to declare a major.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby EagleMan » Wed Apr 23, 2014 1:32 am

Middle class has a big crunch for attending college. You make too much to qualify for amount of financial aid needed but don't make enough to pay the difference comfortably.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Sly » Sun Apr 27, 2014 10:58 pm

I guess that's it between me and boy toy.
I feel like a cold hearted bitch. Ice queen.
Do you have the preparedness to tell a lie? How is it?
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Sly » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:15 pm

<___< Saddest thing ever where I'm like "Yo I need some girl talk," and I go through my skype list and....no one : /
Steam list, definitely not. Facebook? I got one friend who I might feel comfortable talking this over with, but she's not online. Imma write it out here cuz I can't take it anymore.

I've had some time to reflect on mentioned break up of relationship I was never really in. And at first I felt like such an ice bitch and that I was an asshole for not dating him.Then reflection came full circle and I was pissed at him for putting me in a position to break his heart like that after we agreed we weren't dating from the very beginning. What was the point of being up front and honest with him about it if I'm such an asshole for not dating him anyway?

We had a heart to heart conversation on Sunday, and I told him straight "I don't have feelings for you. I gave it my best shot, and after two months, I haven't fallen for you, and I'm not going to date someone I don't love."

But the whole conversation was him all like "I'm not worth it to you. I'm not good enough for you."
He's apparently got a long history of being friendzoned by girls, and I never knew this the whole time I was with him. I'm the first one not to give him a shitty excuse and tell him straight. But it's not like I was playing him, I told him everything from the start. Why am I still the asshole? Why can't we just hang out with each other and enjoy spending time with each other and not worry about where our relationship is headed?

But you know what really annoys me? He's fuckin' leaving the country in another 8 months. He doesn't want me to go to Pittsburgh, but he's gonna go to the Philippines and I would have to wait for him to get back. And I'm an asshole for saying no to that? I just got out of a 2.5 year long distance relationship, so fuck it no I'm not gonna do that. I'm just fuckin' not. And I don't think I'm such a bitch for not agreeing to do it with someone I've been hanging out with for just 2-3months.
Like goddamnit that is a LOT to ask of someone, and it's a lot of pressure to put on a girl.

I'm angry because some of the shit he said in that conversation was just unfair. As if my feelings of being under pressure weren't important, just his feelings of him getting put down. And I just got suckered into it. I spent the whole conversation being hard on myself for being an ice bitch, rather than saying anything about how it was a lot to ask of me.

How about I say something that is actually assholish: why men gotta be all emotional on me huh? What the fuck ever happened to playing the field and testing the water? Why does everything have to be ruined with the word "forever"?

It's assholish because being all emotional isn't gender based, it's person based. I gave it serious thought during said reflection period, that maybe having a girlfriend might be easier than having to deal with men. But that's just silly to expect it to be any different girl or guy. For right now, I've had enough male drama, and I'm just gonna stay out of relationshipness altogether because apparently I can't play the field correctly. And even that is hilarious to say, because it's only been one guy. Again it's not like I had a bunch of boys all over giving me shit. It was one, and I cared about his feelings over mine, and I'm still the asshole. Fine, I'm the asshole then. I'll be the asshole if I have to be.

If any more guys confess to me for the next while or so, it's 100% forget it cuz I'm not dealing with it anymore while I got enough shit to worry about in my life. Getting a job in my field, situating my loan. All that shit I gotta figure out and soon.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Millo » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:23 pm

Wow that guy sounds like a total jerk. Sly there's absolutely no reason you should feel guilty for breaking his heart. One you were completely honest from the beginning about your intentions. He's the one who didn't take it to heart and assumed you would change your mind later but got angry when you didn't. Also he's sort of right in the sense that he's not good enough for you, he seems like an immature douche. I can't believe he has the audacity to ask you not to go to Pittsburgh jesus fucking christ how does his brain work
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Sly » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:38 pm

v__v I don't want to bash him THAT hard, Millo.
He didn't ask me not to go to Pittsburgh. He told me he didn't want me to go.
I hold it slightly against him because then he got upset in the whole slew of "you're not willing to make it work while i'm gone." but he was the one to tell me he didn't want me to go. So at that point I'm kinda like "okay, how selfish are we gonna be here?" And who is being more selfish anyway between the two of us?

you can't call him a douche because he's a really, really nice guy. too nice, really. It's just when push came to shove, well, I'm sure we both sounded like assholes.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:43 pm

Considering what you're saying, and how one sided it was, you were right to reject him on the grounds that you did.

Don't feel sad, or angry, or anything about it.

You weren't wrong in this. The only way you were wrong is when you thought you were the villain.

Love is when you wish for someone's wellbeing more than anything, after all.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:45 pm

No one is allowed to hold you hostage, so don't give him that power.

You don't love him. That's not wrong. It's just a fact.

It's totally fair to end the relationship.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Millo » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:45 pm

Sly wrote:v__v I don't want to bash him THAT hard, Millo.
He didn't ask me not to go to Pittsburgh. He told me he didn't want me to go.
I hold it slightly against him because then he got upset in the whole slew of "you're not willing to make it work while i'm gone." but he was the one to tell me he didn't want me to go. So at that point I'm kinda like "okay, how selfish are we gonna be here?" And who is being more selfish anyway between the two of us?

you can't call him a douche because he's a really, really nice guy. too nice, really. It's just when push came to shove, well, I'm sure we both sounded like assholes.

That's the thing if he truly cared about you he wouldn't want you to not go. He probably knows how much this opportunity means to you and to say that he doesn't want you to go is like saying he's not happy for you.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Sly » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:49 pm

Hm...I dunno. I mean...I know how much it means to him to go to the Philippines and see his family and pursue his culinary degree. And the whole time I always told him I want him to go and have fun and explore and meet people.
You kind have a point I guess.
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Re: Snafu Therapy Thread.

Postby Yog » Tue Apr 29, 2014 9:53 pm

You obviously cared about him more than he did you.

You're not an ice queen, haha. Far from it.
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