Here's what i'd do. If i was out of toilet paper at the time, i'd just use handkerchiefs and suffer the bad texture of the paper a bit while i went to get more. If there were no napkins in the house, then i'd grab a tissue. You cannot tell me there were neither of those because it's dumb to assume there is absolutely no kind of paper in the house.
I mean seriously, i'm a graphic designer, i have tons of kinds of papers, i'd just grab a cotton based paper so my anus wouldn't bleed.